Saints Row: The NEMO Sensor addon
by Brinkster117
Summary: THQ has just released their new addon pack that incorporates the Kinect sensor with the game. They left specific details out about the addon, but they said it will allow full interaction with the characters of Saints Row: The Third. When Brian realizes what the addon pack really does, he gets submerged into a new experience within Steelport and the people of the city.
1. The Free Fall into Steelport

**I don't own the Saints Row series. This is my recreation of the Saints Row: the Third Campaign.**

Brian is a 15 year old kid who loves to play games in his own crazy style. With the new Saints Row: The Third DLC coming out that has incorporated unspecified Kinect features, Brian rushed his way to GameStop after school with his mother. During the drive, Brian's mind had many different ideas rush through his head. "What if there is voice commands, like 'Call Shaundi' or 'compliment'?" Brian thought to himself.

"So, what are we going to GameStop for again?" his mother asked.

"For a four thousand Microsoft Points card." Brian replied, staring out the window and grinning. "The new Saints Row DLC is going to be amazing."

"Really? That much?"

"Yeah... And Saints Row one."

"This is going to be fifty dollars, Brian. You're going to owe us."

"Yeah yeah, I know. I just want Saints Row and this DLC..."

His mother sighs as she pulls into the parking lot In the plaza where the GameStop was. Both of them got out of the car and started walking to the store. "This is going to be sweet..." Brian said.

"It better be worth it, Brian." his mother replied, sighing.

"It has Kinect features. Of course it will be awesome!"

"What kind of Kinect features?"

"I'm not sure... But then again, no one knows. A lot of ideas are going through my head, though."

His mother sighs. "How is this suppose to be good when you don't even know what it is?" his mother asked.

"Surprises?"

"Do you know ANYTHING about this DLC?"

"All I know is that it has Kinect features and it enhances the game to the point to where you can fully interact with the characters."

They both walk into the store as his mother says "It better be worth it, Brian..." as Brian walks to the Xbox 360 selection and searched for Saints Row. A few minutes after, Brian finally finds it and walks over to the checkout counter with the game. His mother already put the card of Microsoft Points on the counter. "So," the clerk said. "Getting the new DLC for Saints Row?"

"Yeah." Brian replies. "I'm also getting the first game because I miss it."

"Traded it in before?"

"Yeah, two years ago." Brian says, sighing.

The man shrugs a bit as he scans the card and the game, putting them in a bag with the GameStop logo printed on it. When Brian and his mom got back in the car and drive back home, it felt like an hour for Brian, even though it was a ten minutes. Brian got out of the car and walked quickly to the door, unlocking it with his keys and throwing the door open. He runs up the stairs and dashed into his room, pressing the power button on his Xbox and peeling off the cover on the card. After a few seconds of the Xbox starting up, he grabs the controller and opens the guide.

A small beep comes from the headset he wore as a notification that read "LoNeWoLf12169 wants you to join an Xbox LIVE party" pops up on the screen. He opens the invite and accepts it quickly, watching as his gamer tag popped up onto the party menu.

"Sup, Bruce." Brian says.

"Getting the DLC?" Bruce asks over the headset.

"Yeah." Brian replies. "Hang on for a sec. I need to put in my Microsoft Points."

"Alright." Bruce says.

Brian reopens the guide, moving to the left and selecting "Redeem Code" on the menu. A keyboard pops up on the screen with a small message that reads "Input your code and press enter when you're finished." Brian quickly and carefully puts in the code, clicking "Enter" afterwards. He clicks "Redeem Points" after it verified the code for him, then quickly moved to the game marketplace on the dashboard.

"So, what do you think NEMO Sensor may have on it?" Bruce asks.

"I'm not sure." Brian replies. "Hopefully something awesome, like voice commands or physical movement involved into it. I really want to interact with the homies, though."

"Yeah. What makes it better is co-op. We can join each other's game, too."

"Fuck yeah." Brian says as he presses "Confirm Purchase" on the NEMO Sensor addon pack. "It's downloading now." he says.

"Good. This is going to be awesome." Bruce says.

"Yeah." Brian replies in an exciting way. "Time to fuck shit up in Steelport."

A few minutes after, the download completes for Brian. He opens the game and clicks on new game. He got excited for it, but after the first few cutscenes, the game plays normally. "What the hell..." Brian says in disappointment.

"What?" Bruce asks.

"Nothing has changed yet. It's still the same as before."

"...Maybe when you get to the character customization, it will work?"

"We'll see." Brian says as he plays through the first mission.

The man dressed in a Johnny Gat outfit jumps back into the building, nearly escaping death again like previous times. He climbs back in and lays on the floor as he looks around. Several swat members surround him, aiming their rifles at him with multiple clicks. "Aw, shit..." The vocoded masked man mutters.

Brian blasts through the mission summary, watching as the black weapons flooded the screen. Instead of the character selection screen popping up, a small menu pops up on the black screen, saying "Enable the NEMO Sensor addon pack?" Brian grins, pressing "yes" on it. The screen then opens up a new menu with it showing the Kinect camera view and an outline of a man on it. The top read "Please stand in the outline so we can scan your body."

"About time." Brian says.

"Was I right?" Bruce asks.

"Yeah, and you can be yourself in the game, too."

"Nice." Bruce replies.

"Hang on. I'm going to take my mic off for a sec so it can scan me."

"Alright."

Brian takes off his headset and tosses the controller and headset onto his bed as he stands up, standing in the position of the outline. After a minute of scanning his body, a beep plays, and the text changes, now reading "Good! Now turn around and let it scan your back." Brian shrugs and turns around, standing in the same position as the outline again and stares at the wall. Another beep goes off as the guns again flood the screen.

Brian turns around as Kinzie walks onto the screen with her laptop in her arms. "Hey boss." she says as she walks closer. "Ready to kick ass in Steelport?" she whispers with a grin. Two text show up to her left and right. On the left, it said "To enable NEMO Sensor, say: Hell yeah! It's my time now. Let's get this shit started!" and on the right it says "To play the name normally, say: Fuck that. I'd rather use a controller."

Brian grins. "Hell yeah! It's my time now. Let's get this shit started!" he said with pride.

"Good." Kinzie said, opening her laptop and typing. "Now give me a second. I just need to integrate your mind and body into the game, allowing you to travel into virtual reality to get into Steelport, which will..." As she keeps talking, a text pops up under her that reads. "Now say: For fuck sakes, Kinzie. Keep it simple."

Brian shrugs. "Now," she keeps talking, "As soon as every-"

"For fuck sakes, Kinzie." Brian interrupts her. "Keep it simple."

Kinzie sighs, staring at him with her finger over a button on her laptop. "Basically," she says, "It's like a refrence to Tron."

After she said that, she presses the button on her laptop. The red light in the Kinect starts glowing brighter, charging. Brian looked at the Kinect with wide eyes, saying "Wait, wha-" as the laser shoots out directly at him, freezing him in place. The Kinect starts dissolving him, sucking in his pixelated particles piece by piece. As soon as he is fully dissolved and sucked into the Kinect, Kinzie turns around and walks off as the guns flood the screen again.

* * *

The blackness fades away as Brian finds himself in front of a cell, holding Johnny and Shaundi inside of it. The cell doors open as he is shoved inside of the cell, stumbling forward as he turns around to find about four cops standing there. One of the cops close the cell doors in front of him.

"What the hell?" Brian says, looking around. "Where am I, and what the hell am I doing here?"

"Yeah," Shaundi says. "We'd paid up this month."

"Someone paid more." one of the cops replied as they walked away.

"...What happened..." Johnny says in disappointment.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out." Brian mutters.

"We got arrested." Shaundi replies.

"No," Johnny says, turning to Brian. "To us... Birk's right. We traded in our dicks in for pussies. Seriously, movie deals? Commercials? The Saints used to mean something more than body spray and some ass tasting energy drink."

Brian sighs. "I don't even know myself. I need to get some money-" he stops himself.

"...Is that what it's all about..." Johnny replies in disappointment, looking away.

"It's always about the money, mister Gat." a familiar female voice says, causing all three of them to turn and face two twins walking in with several armed guards. "Which is precisely why our employer wishes to speak with you."

"If you'll indulge us." the other twin says, causing Brian to groan dreadfully.

* * *

A few hours later (which to Brian was just a scene change in the game), the three Saints find themselves tied to a chair in a plane above the skies of Steelport.

Gat Struggles in his seat as Shaundi and Brian stare at the chair as it turns around. "The fuck..." Brian groans. "Do you have any idea who you're fucking with?" he decides to just play along with the scene, knowing he'll get nowhere if he doesn't.

"Of course." the Belgian, Fillipe Loren replies as one of the twins who Brian knows to be Viola sets a Johnny Gat bobble head down on his desk, next to him. He taps the head of the figure, causing the head to bobble around on the shoulders. "A remarkable likeness. These visions are Viola and Kiki," he motions to the twins standing on both sides of his desk. "and I am Fillipe Loren, chairman of a multinational organization called The Syndicate."

"Isn't it bad enough that I know what they are?" Brian asks, sighing.

"...What?" Shaundi replies, a bit confused.

"The Syndicate. Ran by three dumbass stupid gangs, The Morning Star..." he nods his head to Fillipe. "...The Deckers, and the fucking Luchadores."

"Never heard of them." Shaundi says.

"...Evidently not, or you would not have robbed our bank." Loren replies, staring at Brian. "Perhaps you wonder why you're still breathing at this point."

"W-" Brian was about to say something.

"Actually," Gat interrupts Brian. "I wonder why my foot is not up your ass at this point."

Loren stands up, walking over to Gat. "Like it or not, mister Gat, our organization is expanding into Stilwater. I am offering you a chance to leverage your assets against your lives." he turns to the twins. "Ladies?"

"You may continue to operate the Saints/Ultor media group as you see fit," Viola starts off. "In exchange for sixty-six percent of your monthly gross revenue."

"That is before taxes, of course." Kiki follows up.

Brian sighs. "Listen, frenchy, I-"

"Please," Loren interrupts Brian. "I am Belgian."

"So make yourself a fucking waffle!" Gat says, insulting Loren. "We done here..."

Loren sighs, turning away. "And I had so hoped that we could come to a rational business arrangement."

"Nope." Brian says. "Didn't happen with the Brotherhood, not going to happen here..."

One of the members walks up to Gat, pulling out a 45. Shepard and aiming it directly at his head. Gat somehow manages to pull the bolted chair off the floor with him as he rams the man, bursting out of his restraints and punching the man. As he gets up, Loren pulls out a switchblade and stabs him. Grunting, Gat grabs Loren's head and rams him into one of the windows, smashing it opens as he screams. With the knife still in Gat, he turns around and kicks the second member, countering his punch. He punches him in the jaw, throwing the man limp to the ground.

Viola and Kiki grab Loren as he holds his face and pulls him to safety as Gat pulls the knife out and cuts both Brian and Shaundi's ties. As the copilot walks out to see what's going on, Gat stares at him for a brief moment. "What the hell's going-?!" was all the man could say as Gat threw the knife, impaling his head.

"Boss, you gotta bail!" Gat says, pointing at Brian.

"No Johnny." Brian replies. "I'm not leaving you to die here!"

Six men, armed with machine guns, all rush out of the same room, firing at the three as they take cover behind a desk. "What is this, like half a dozen guys?" Gat asks, looking over the desk for a brief moment. "I can take 'em."

"What about the plane?" Shaundi asks.

"I'll fly it back to Stilwater."

"Johnny, you can't even drive a stick!" both Brian and Shaundi say in unison. "How are you going to fly a plane?"

"If anyone is flying a plane, it should be me." Brian continues.

"Details, details..." Gat replied. "Just cover the boss... Go, I got this."

Gat moves from the desk to the member closest to them and disarms him, spraying the man down with lead as Brian and Shaundi both run out the door. Gat closes the door, still firing at the squad as he and Brian put their backs against the door. Brian gets off the door as three more members run after him and Shaundi.

"We can't leave Johnny!" Shaundi says.

"I wish we didn't have to, Shaundi!" Brian replies as he grabs a member by his shoulders and knees him in the groin. "Holy shit." Brian thought to himself. "I felt that."

"Attention, passengers..." Gat says over the intercoms. "This is your new captain speaking. Our updated flight plan has us landing in Stilwater."

Loren's voice is heard over the intercoms, speaking French in a harsh tone.

"I'd like to remind all passengers to remain seated and enjoy the flight." Gat said as both Brian and Shaundi throw a punch into the same guy's face, throwing him across the room like a rag doll.

"I still wonder how Gat got that mic." Brian says as he flicks his hand around a little.

"GET THIS DOOR OPEN!" Loren shouts over the intercoms as two more members open the next door and run after Brian and Shaundi.

"Oh, I can see some of our passengers are getting restless." Gat continues as Brian throws a hard punch at the running man's face, knocking him backwards onto the floor with a limp. "Here's some relaxing music for your enjoyment."

As the music plays over the intercoms, Brian walks into the next room, noticing a man aiming a 45. Shepard directly at him. The place jolts around all of the sudden, throwing the mans aim off and causing all three of them to stumble. As soon as Brian regains his balance, he sprints directly at the man and drop kicks him to the floor, causing him to lose his pistol.

"My apologies." Gat says. "Your captain his having trouble finding the clutch..."

Brian grabs the gun as the man gets up into a sitting position and aims it at his head, pulling the trigger. The man's head jolts back as the bullet goes through it, making him fall back. The recoil of the gun sends Brian's arm flying backwards. "Holy shit, that's a lot of recoil." Brian says.

"What did you expect?" Shaundi replies. "A normal pistol recoil?"

"Eh, point taken. Now I know why we hold it with two hands instead of one."

Brian moves his other hand under the gun as he aims it at the cargo bay door. He opens it, firing at the man as he stands on the other side of the door. He falls limp to the ground, losing his pistol. After Brian walks through, Shaundi grabs the pistol and loads a fresh mag into it.

"I'm opening the cargo bay doors!" Gat says over the intercoms. "Find some chutes and jump out the back. It should be clear!"

A man on the catwalks starts firing at Brian and Shaundi, hitting Brian in the shoulder. Brian clutches his shoulder, yelling as he feels the pain of getting shot for the first time. Shaundi shoots the man and the armed woman standing next to him, turning around to face Brian. "You act like you never got shot before." she says.

"This fucking hurts!" Brian grunts out.

"Oh quit being a bitch. You got shot plenty of times before."

"Yeah, but I didn't feel those back then! Now I can feel it! FUCK!"

"My god, you're a pussy..."

Brian rolls that shoulder slightly, wincing at the pain. "Oh, if only you knew..."

"Alright, motherfuckers!" Gat yells out.

"The door it op-"

"KILL HIM!" Loren interrupts.

As Brian and Shaundi walk down the stairs into the cargo bay, Gat is heard grunting as he fights off a few members in the cockpit. Brian jumps over the front of a car, firing three shots into another members chest. A bullet flies past him, causing Brian to jump backwards into cover.

"You're gonna need more help than that, frenchy..." Gat grunts out.

"I. Am. Belgian." Loren says, annoyed.

"SAME THING!"

Brian grabs a female member, disarming her and pulling her closer to him, using her as a human shield as he and Shaundi advance through the cargo bay.

"I am going to cut that disrespectful tongue from your mouth..." Loren continues.

"Oh yeah?" Gat says. "You and how many of your- oh... That many..."

Brian moves up to the final part of the cargo bay, still holding the woman as a human shield as two more members walk up and start firing at Brian. The woman screams in pain as she gets shot in the stomach. "You see?!" Brian screams out, shooting one of the members in the head. "It does hurt like a bitch!"

Shaundi sighs. "You used to WALK IT OFF before. Now it hurts you?" As she says this, she fires at the second member, hitting him three times. The man falls limp onto the ground.

"Long story!" Brian yells as he throws the bleeding woman into a propane tank and shooting it, killing her instantly. They then run up to the end of the cargo bay, over to a speaker as Shaundi holds down a button.

"Johnny, we're about to jump!" she yells as Brian puts on a parachute quickly.

More grunting is heard from Gat's side, then a body is heard falling to the ground with a thud. "Right on." Gat grunts out. "I'll see you in Stilwa-" massive amount of machine guns are heard firing and another thud is heard. Static is only heard from the other line.

"...Johnny..." Shaundi asks.

Brian sighs, patting her on the shoulder. "Come on..." he says as he walks over to the opening of the cargo bay doors. As he walks over, the plane jolts around again, causing both Brian and Shaundi to stumble and fall out the back of the plane. Brian grabs hold of the edge of the door, then grabs Shaundi with his free hand as she holds onto his hand for her life. As Brian looks up, he gets hit by a black car, causing them both to fall out the plane. Shaundi loses her grip on Brian's hand, causing her to fall faster down.

Brian moves his arms to his sides and holds his legs together as he falls after Shaundi. "Hang on Shaundi!" he yells. "I'm coming!" Just as soon as Brian extends his arms out to catch her, a man grabs hold of him, causing them both to spin out of control. "Fuck off!" Brian yells as he disarms the man and elbows him several times in the face. As the man loses his grip on Brian, Brian grabs hold of him and uses him as a human shield as he notices more members fall after him.

"Really?!" Brian yells as he opens fire, Killing one man and losing his aim from the recoil of the gun. "Jesus, you guys suck!" He re-aims the gun and kills the other two falling towards him. He opens the parachute of the man he uses as a body shield, instantly letting go as the man decreases speed at a faster rate.

Two more men fall after Brian, getting below him as he does a backflip and opens fire on them. He riddles the guys chest with bullets as he runs out of ammo. As he reloads, the other member shoots his left arm. Brian grunts, aiming the gun at the man and shooting him in the head.

Brian does another backflip, finding three guys falling after him in a line. Brian grins, shooting the first guy and holding the trigger down as all three men fall into his line of fire. He does another backflip and falls after Shaundi again.

"Why is there so much fucking cargo?!" Brian yells as he notices a lot of cargo falling down with him. He starts maneuvering around the cargo, getting closer to Shaundi. Brian hits a pallet, grunting as he flips uncontrollably through the air. He regains his posture as he starts falling faster again. He finally grabs Shaundi and pulls the parachute string, throwing out the parachute and slowing them down.

"I'm not gonna lie." Shaundi says, breathing heavily. "For a minute, I didn't think you'd make it in time."

"Of course I'm gonna catch you." Brian says as he looks at the plane. "You're not dying on me- oh fuck..."

"What?"

"Okay, don't panic, but that plane is gonna try to ram us. I know this for a fact."

"What do you mean 'don't panic?' Do you have a plan?"

"Yeah... I do the random shit I do all the time? Fly through The plane and jump out the back?"

"I hope you mean 'we'..."

Brian sighs. "Look, just remember how happy you were when I caught you..." he says, dropping her.

"Wait, what- ASSHOLE!" she screams as she falls.

Brian groans as the plane speeds towards him. He pulls out his machine gun and aims it at the windshield. "Well, fuck this..." he says as he opens fire. He bashes through the bullet-ridden windshield, flying straight through the cockpit. A member gets up from his chair, aiming his gun at Brian as he flies by. Brian unstraps the parachute and tosses it to the man's head, instantly snapping his neck as he slides down the wall. Brian keeps flying through the plane, doing a front flip.

A man on the catwalks of the cargo bay turns around, watching as Brian aims his gun and fires. The bullets riddle his chest and one bullet hits his head, but before he can fall, Brian grabs his body, spinning in circles as he shoots more members on the cargo bay catwalks. He shoots a barrel as he flies out, engulfing the entire cargo bay into flames. He takes the new parachute off the body and tosses it away from him, putting the chute on and falling straight down to grab Shaundi again.

"How the fuck did I do that?!" Brian says to himself, scratching his head as he looks up. As he looks up, he notices more members of the Morning Star falling down after him. He pulls the magazine out of the gun and swaps it for a new one, bumping it into the gun with a click. The men slow down as they catch up to Brian, aiming their weapons at him and firing. Brian fires back, causing the guy at his left to spin out of control, away from the others. He holds the trigger back as he swings the gun slowly to the right, throwing them spinning out of control. After he kills the members, he does a backflip and falls after Shaundi again, only to collide with another member and spin out of control.

"I said FUCK OFF!" Brian yells as he punches the man in the face several times, disarming him and shooting him away. He goes after Shaundi, who's only about two hundred feet away from him now, maneuvering through more cargo. When he finally reaches Shaundi, he grabs her as they both spin out of control and pulls the string on the parachute, slowing down and gliding down to Steelport.

"Got ya!" Brian yells as he catches her.

"You're a fucking asshole!" Shaundi yells in his ears.

"I know." Brian replies.

* * *

When they hit the ground in some back alley, Brian throws the parachute in a dumpster as he walks around the corner, walking over a sleeping bum. He looks over to his left as an ugly fat hooker dances to get his attention. He quickly looks over to the right, finding a hooker getting on her knees as a business man unzips his pants and places both of his hands behind his head. What catches his attention is the bum with a sign that says "FEEL BOSS $5". He scratches his head as he walks over to the ATM, punching in "1,000,000.00." The ATM beeps at him as the words "INSUFFICIENT FUNDS" pop up onto the scream. Shaundi and Brian look at each other for a second, then Brian looks around the city, before head butting the ATM machine.

**Yes, new fanfic. This will be tough, but I'm looking forward to seeing this through. I know this isn't the right dialogue and it feels like I'm spoiling the game, but think of it this way: the protagonist, Brian was sucked into a video game that he has beaten before so he knows how EVERYTHING ends. Hoped you guys enjoyed the first chapter.**


	2. Guns Needed

**Yes, hi. I don't own the Saints Row series. I own copies, just not the series.**

Brian rubs his head as he turns around, sighing because he just head butted an ATM machine. He rolls his head around his shoulders, cracking his neck a few times. As Shaundi and Brian walk down the tunnel full of strippers, hookers and brothels, Brian's phone starts ringing. He pulls his phone out, looking at the caller ID. Shaundi looks at him as he sighs, pulling the phone up to his ear.

"The body of mister Gat will be a message for all who oppose The Syndicate." Loren says over the line. "There is n-"

"Yeah yeah," Brian interrupts, "No mercy, only death, blah blah blah... Shove your message up your ass, Loren."

"Why you disrespectful little..."

"I'm done talking to you. Goodbye, Loren."

"Don't mourn your friend. You'll be-" Brian ends the call.

"Loren's gonna pay for this..." Shaundi says angrily.

Brian keeps walking as he looks around at the buildings. Some buildings had barrels that had burning wood inside of it for a heat source. There are some hookers standing outside, one of them smoking as she gives Shaundi a weird looking stare of disgust. Shaundi rolls her eyes as she looks back at Brian, who's staring at breast on the wall with raised eyebrows.

"Wow..." Brian says, shaking his head as he looks around. "Out of all the places we could have landed... We land here."

"Yep." Shaundi replies, sighing. "Steelport. It's kinda like Bangkok's abusive father."

"Yep. I can tell you've been here before."

"Spring break."

"Of course..." Brian says as he swings open the car door and gets inside. Shaundi gets in on the other side as Brian leans back into the chair, holding the wheel with one hand as he looks at her. "I wonder, what the fuck does feel boss mean?"

She stares at him. "You DON'T want to know..."

Brian shrugs as he focuses his attention to the front of the car, starting it and driving into the street. "Remember anything interesting that happened in this city?" he asks.

"I was really high the last time I was here." she replies. "Just drive. Hopefully I'll remember something."

After a few minutes of driving, Brian sighs. "So..." he starts out. "About getting a gun..."

"Just look up friendly fire on your phone." Shaundi says, looking out the window.

"What?" Brian says, looking at her.

"It has GPS, right? Check your map."

Brian shakes his head, feeling stupid. "Out of all the things I forget, I forget that?" he mutters to himself. "Anyways, have you sent a text to Pierce about the situation?"

"Yeah. He's bringing the crew."

"And we'll need guns for the crew. Time to raid the guard armory."

"Wait, what..." Shaundi says, staring at Brian.

"You heard me." Brian replies.

"You can't be serious..."

"I am." he says, looking at her as he takes a right turn. "We need the guns. It can't be that hard to take them."

"Getting shot comes to mind." she says, annoyed. "And plus, you became a pussy out of nowhere."

"Shaundi, I flew through a fucking plane." he says in an irritated tone. "Do you think I care about getting shot by pistols now?"

"That was also a shitty idea!"

"Stop complaining, Pierce. Let me talk to Shaundi."

"Not cool." she says, looking away.

"You and I both know he bitches about EVERYTHING and-"

"Alright! Alright!" Shaundi yells slightly. "We'll pick a fight with the military..."

"Good times." Brian says, grinning.

Shaundi's eyes stare at a building straight ahead of the car. "Wow... That still exists?"

"What?" Brian asks.

She points at the building. "That's the place where I used to score weed."

"Huh." Brian says, looking at the building. "Which reminds me, keep up with an ex in Steelport?"

"As a matter of fact, I do." Shaundi replies.

"Of course his place won't be big enough for the crew."

"But I already offered it to Pierce and the boys."

"Oh well..." Brian says, sighing. He pulls up to the Friendly Fire, parking on the sidewalk as he turns off the car.

"Here's the money I have on me." Shaundi says, giving him about a hundred and fifty dollars. Brian gets out of the car, walks into the front door, then places the cash Shaundi gave him on the center. "I need six 45. caliber magazines."

The store clerk, dressed in a green hoodie, counts the money silently to herself as she pulls out the six mags and places them on the counter. "Here you go, sir." she says as she puts the money away. Brian grabs the mags, placing them in his pockets as he nods to the girl with a smile before walking out of the store. After he gets back into the car, he pulls out his phone and looks at his GPS. "Got the armory on the map?" he asks.

"Yeah." she replies, sighing. "You really want to do this?"

"Shaundi, let's be honest..." Brian says, looking at her as he starts the car. "I've done dumber shit in Stilwater."

Shaundi thinks for a moment. "True..." she says, leaning back into the seat as Brian drives off.

* * *

Brian pulls out his pistol, holding it in his free hand as he drifts onto the road leading to the armory. As he regains speed, he rams the checkpoint, bashing two soldiers with the car and sending one flying. "Alright, the guns should all be in that warehouse." Shaundi says, pulling the handle back on the gun and releasing it, loading the gun.

"Let's hope Pierce can load the guns up." Brian says as he stops the car directly in front of the gate.

"Oh so now you think of that?"

"I'm more focused on killing them, and besides, Pierce should have it covered."

"You're lucky he does..." Shaundi says as they get out of the car and run through the gate, shooting at soldiers all around them.

"Looks like they won't let us in!" Brian yells as he throws a soldier down to the floor and shoots him.

"Shooting them probably doesn't help change their mind!" Shaundi yells as she sprays a soldier down with lead. Brian takes cover behind a crate, letting out a small breath. He then breaks away from cover, aiming his pistol and shooting the soldier closest to him right in the head. As a soldier aims his gun at Shaundi, Brian jumps, kicking the guy down onto the floor. He lands on the soldiers back and slides five feet ahead of him, shooting another soldier in the chest four times. As the soldier stops sliding, Brian stumbles off of him a few steps forward before regaining his posture and shooting the incapacitated soldier in the back of the head.

"How the fuck did you do that?" Shaundi asks, lowering her weapon.

"I honestly don't fucking know!" Brian yells as she shrugs, reloading his 45. Shepard.

Shaundi chuckles. "Nice one, boss!" she yells back. Brian nods, turning around and facing the bomb behind him. Shaundi looks at the bomb too, walking over to Brian as she swaps magazines for her sub machine gun. "Geez, look at the size of that thing... Bet that's a helluva way to end a gun fight."

"Yep, and I'm taking it." Brian says, staring at the bomb.

"Yeah right..." Shaundi snickers, then stares at him slowly. "Wait, you're serious, aren't you..."

Brian chuckles, nodding as he walks into the warehouse. Shaundi follows him in after she sighs, shaking her head as she looks around. A few shots go off, causing Brian to take cover behind a steel support and making Shaundi aim her gun at the catwalk, firing back at the soldiers who fired first. Brian pops out of cover as one of the soldiers side steps away from Shaundi's line of fire, shooting the soldier directly between the eyes and watching as his body jumps over the railing, falling limp onto the ground with a large thud. The other soldier gets lit up by Shaundi's machine gun, falling off the railing almost the same way as the other soldier.

As they both walk to the back, Brian grabs a weird laptop and pulls it closer to him on the desk. "Alright," Shaundi starts off, pulling out a shotgun from a crate and tossing it to Brian.. "Here's the weapons cache, and those looks like UAV drone controls."

"UAVs... Gotta love 'em." Brian says, typing on the laptop and pulling up the UAV, about five hundred yards away from the Armory. "Welp, still gotta use the pistol then... Shaundi, catwalks. Now." He says as he hears soldiers gathering outside of the warehouse.

"Right." Shaundi nods, running up the stairs and over to the front of the warehouse on the catwalks. Brian grabs the shotgun off the desk, cocking it and slinging it as he runs over to a crate and takes cover behind it. Shaundi starts unloading onto the soldiers, dropping about three of them as Brian pops up from cover with his pistol, dropping five more with head shots. Five soldiers flood in, all firing at Brian as he ducks back into cover. Sighing, he holsters the 45. Shepard and unslings his shotgun, sitting there and waiting for them to get closer.

Shaundi runs back to the stairs, yelling "TANK!" as she notices the soldiers moving up to Brian's position. She quickly reloads and sprays down two of them as Brian jumps from his cover, sticking the barrel of the gun into the soldiers gut and pulling the trigger. He then tosses the shotgun up in the air, kicking the next soldier as he catches the pump, swinging the butt stock of the shotgun into the soldiers groin. The man falls onto his knees as he grabs his balls, groaning in as Brian pulls out his pistol and shoots the last soldier four times in the chest. Hearing the thud, the soldier looks up to Brian as he swaps mags, cocking the pistol and aiming it at the man. He pulls the trigger, sending a bullet straight through the soldiers helmet as he falls sideways onto the floor like a rag doll.

"Okay," Shaundi says as she swaps mags. "THAT was impressive."

"And you think I'm a pussy?" Brian says, chuckling.

"You proved to me that you're not one after all."

"Love to win... Anywa-" bullets fly past the two, causing Brian to grab Shaundi and pull her into cover behind a crate with him. "Did you say tank earlier?"

"Yeah." Shaundi says, looking over the crate. "Pierce, where the hell are you?"

"You know me..." Pierce says over the phone as helicopters are heard hovering over the warehouse. Brian looks over the crate, watching as the helicopters rain hell down on the soldiers, dropping them one by one. As the soldiers focus their attention on the new enemy, Brian sits back down behind the crate as a Humvee explodes outside. "I love to make an entrance..." Pierce continues as the last remaining soldiers fall dead onto the ground.

"If we're staying, maybe it's time to use the UAV drones." Shaundi says, walking over to the desk.

"Yeah, that would be best right now..." Brian says as he gets up and follows her, typing onto the drone control. The screen pops up again, showing a camera view of the drone and a HUD. Brian grabs the stick as he moves the camera around on the drone, aiming directly at an incoming humvee and firing a dumb missile. The missile hits directly on target, instantly destroying the vehicle.

"Di-did you just launch?!" a voice shouts over the computer.

"T-that wasn't me! I swear!" another voice stutters on the computer.

"Why aren't we getting the hell outta here?" Pierce asks over the phone.

"The boss won't leave without the bomb!" Shaundi replies as she watches Brian destroy another humvee.

"You gotta be kidding me!"

"Less bitching, more shooting!" Brian yells over the phone as he fires a guided missile in between two humvees, destroying both of them.

"STOP FIRING!" the first voice yells.

"I'M NOT!" the other voice cries out.

"Oh god, there's another one!" the first voice says as Brian fires another dumb missile.

"We gotta shut this thing down!" the second voice yells as Brian sends a guided missile down the gunner hatch of an incoming tank, destroying it instantly. He then shifts his attention at another incoming tank, launching five dumb missiles at it. All of them hit the tank, severely damaging it as the fifth missile finishes it off.

"Do you think we got enough guns?" Shaundi asks.

"Nope." Brian replies as he destroys more humvees.

"So once we're loaded up, we're going after Loren, right?"

Brian pats her on the shoulder, still staring at the screen. "Don't worry." he says. "Loren will be dead soon enough, Shaundi." Two more tanks appear on screen as Brian shifts the camera, wasting no time as he sends a guided missile at both tanks and destroying them both. "How's it coming, Pierce?" Brian asks.

"Almost done." Pierce replies.

"The sooner, the better!" he yells as he sends another guided missile down the hatch of the gunner seat of a tank, destroying it instantly. As the other tank pulls up to the gate, Brian quickly rains dumb missiles over the tank, not letting it fire a shot at the helicopter and destroying it.

"We're all set." Pierce says. "Get in the chopper."

"On our way!" Brian says, closing the control and grabbing it, sprinting off with Shaundi to the helicopter.

* * *

"Damnit, these guys are a pain in my ass!" Pierce says, taking off as he notices attack choppers tailing them.

"We can't let them blow up the bomb!" Shaundi says as she picks up a light machine gun and fires at a chopper. "Or Pierce. That'd be bad."

"I got this..." Brian says, firing his light machine gun at a chopper's cockpit, killing the pilot and watching as it spins out of control and falls into the water. One by one, Brian and Shaundi shoot down the choppers as they fly to her ex's house.

"It'd be easier if these things weren't moving so fast!" Shaundi yells as she shoots up a chopper, watching it explode in mid air.

"Nice!" the helicopter pilot yells at Brian and Shaundi.

"Pierce, just keep going." Shaundi says. "We're clearing them out."

As Pierce and the other pilots kept close to the bomb, Brian and Shaundi kept firing at the other choppers, watching as they fell out of the sky, either exploding in mid air or having engine fires. Brian shifts to a separate chopper as it got close to the bomb, firing at it. On shot flew to the main rotor blade and hit a pitch control rod, snapping the rod in half. The chopper loses control and starts spinning violently in circles as more parts break off the chopper. After a few seconds, the rotors detached from the chopper, rotors flipping and spinning in the air as the chopper itself fell to the ground, exploding on contact.

"Did that just happen?" Shaundi asks, looking at Brian as she lowers her weapon.

"Yep, and now I feel awesome, even though I don't even know how I just did that." Brian says, reloading his weapon.

"WHAT ARE YOU GUYS WAITING FOR?!" Pierce yells, making Brian and Shaundi raise their weapons and shoot down more attack choppers.

"Does everyone in Steelport own helicopters?!" Shaundi yells as more attack choppers fly over.

"Don't know!" Brian shouts back. "Just keep shooting!"

A few moments later, after ten more attack choppers are destroyed, Shaundi looks over the river, spotting her ex's apartment building. "I see my ex's place." she says. "Take it down over there."

"There's gonna be enough room for this shit, right?" Pierce asks.

"Surprisingly, yes." Brian says.

The helicopter hovers over the building, lowering the bomb down onto the rooftop. Brian sighs as he lays back in the helicopter. "How the fuck did I get caught in this shit..." he mutters to himself.

* * *

As Brian loads a K6 Kurkov, Shaundi walks into the room. "So, what's our next plan?" she asks as Brian turns around and leans on the table.

"First, I figure out how I ended up in a fucking game..." Brian says, looking around.

"...And you go back to Stilwater, girl." Pierce says as he looks at her.

"What?" she asks as she stares at Pierce. "No! This is my fight too."

"Girl, you don't get messy." Pierce says as he checks a machine gun. "Let us take care of business."

Shaundi grabs the K6 Kurkov from Brian's hand. "Fuck you." she says in anger. "I'm doing this for Johnny..."

"She's going to stay, Pierce..." Brian says, looking at him. "But, if were bringing in the crew, we need a pent house."

"You're worried about real-estate?" Shaundi asks sarcastically, shaking the gun in his face. "We have guns. Let's use them."

"Relax, Shaundi..." Brian says, putting an arm on her back as he grabs the K6 and lowers it. "We got it all covered..."

* * *

As soon as everything got situated in the apartment and Pierce and Shaundi left, Brian walked out of the building, looking around. "So I'm really in Steelport..." he says to himself. "Well, this was unexpected... To be sucked into a video game... Just like this." he sighs as leans on the wall, sliding down into a sitting position and resting his elbows on his knees. "Well, fuck me..."

A few minutes past as Brian sits on the wall when his phone starts ringing. He pulls it out of his pocket, pulling it up to his face and reading the contact. "Saint" was all it read. There was no number. He accepts the call, bringing the phone up to his ear. "Sup, boss." the saints says over the phone.

"What's up?" he asks.

"Got a man here that says he knows you. Want me to bring him over?"

Brian wasn't even sure what he meant by that. This wasn't a new mission, or an actual character in the game. "Uh... Sure?" Brian says, unsure himself about what's going to happen.

"Aight." the saints says. "Be there in a second."

Brian lowers the phone, looking around as a purple bulldog pulls up. A kid about the same age as Brian in the passenger seat opens the door and steps out of the car, looking at him. "Hey Brian." the familiar kid says.

"Oh..." Brian said, sighing in relief. "Sup Bruce."

"Where the hell are we?" he asks, looking around.

"Steelport..." Brian says, getting up. "Didn't actually think I was going to end up in the city one day... Literally."

"Yeah." Bruce replies.

"Well, let's walk around." Brian says, walking away from the apartment block. "Gotta see what Steelport is like before we idly throw ourselves at whoever the fuck comes after us with a gun."

"Sounds good." Bruce replies, following Brian. "You know what it feels like to get shot Brian? Hurts like a fucking bitch."

Brian chuckles. "No shit. I've somehow managed to only get shot about two or three times. The first one made Shaundi call me a pussy."

"I got shot about three or four times." Bruce says. "And I had to fly through a plane. Almost missed the guy with the second parachute."

"Heh." Brian replies with a small chuckle. "I did everything that happened in the regular cutscene. I'm not even sure how I did it."

"Of course, since you played through the whole damn game already." Bruce says as he shakes his head. A decker walks down the sidewalk in front of both Brian and Bruce, walking forward to them both. As he gets closer to the two, he stops in front of them, raising his fist and sticking his middle finger out in front of Brian.

"The Saints will be defeated!" the British-voiced Decker says as he holds his finger up.

"Seriously?" Brian asks rhetorically as he stares at the Decker. "You talk about defeating us and all you do is flip us the bird?"

"Indeed." the Decker says as he lowers his hand. "There's much more that just my finger. We got hackers, specialists, brutes, and what do you got? A few stupid gun wielding idiots that you call 'Saints'..."

Brian sighs. "Yeah yeah, whatever. Get out of that electro cyber-punk outfit and wear some real clothing. Stop wearing lip stick like you're a fucking girl and do something already."

The Decker growls slightly as he raises his 45. Shepard up at Brian's head. "You want me to do something?" he asks rhetorically. "Okay then... I'll shoot you myself. You d-"

Brian disarms the Decker before he could finish what he was saying, throwing his face into the wall as he unholsters his 45. Shepard and presses it into the back of his head. "Don't fuck with the Saints, you cyber punk bastard." he says, pulling the trigger and watching as the Decker falls limp onto the floor.

"...You're gonna get us killed if you kill every gang member that taunts us." Bruce says, shaking his head as he looks at the dead Decker.

"Meh. Rather not get shot in the head by a 45 caliber round today." Brian says as he goes through the Deckers pockets, pulling out cash and ammo.

"Hell, no one does." Bruce says as he grabs the 45. Shepard off the ground.

"Im suprised how THQ managed to pull off something big like this." Brian says as he gets up. "Sucked into a game like its fucking Tron and experience real pain like you live in the real world."

"Let's hope we don't get killed while we try to enjoy our stay here." Bruce replies.

"Yeah. Anyways, let's get out of here before we attract anymore unwanted attention."

"Sounds like a good idea right now." Bruce says as they walk back to the apartment.

**Second chapter, finally. Why did I take so long? Several reasons. One, I'm using the dialogue from the actual game and changing it to my own style and my grades are screwing me over. School is messing with my time. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter.**


	3. Steelport, Here We Are

**I don't own the Saints Row series (or anything else referenced in the story). Blarg**

Brian and Bruce both were walking around the area of the safehouse they own, looking around after they spent the night inside of that apartment, paranoid that a decker squad would come after them. Brian looks into a parking lot, then grins as he spots a car of his liking. "Hold on one second," he says as he stops and raises his arm up slightly.

"What?" Bruce says, stopping as he looks at Brian.

He doesn't respond, but instead, walks into the lot, towards the car. Bruce raises an eyebrow as he watches Brian, slightly confused as he stands there. "What the hell is he-" Bruce stops himself as Brian smashes a window open, opening the car door and getting in. After a few minutes, the engine rumbles to life, and Brian drives the car over to the exit, next to Bruce.

"Get in," he says, grinning.

"I don't really trust you driving, Brian."

"Just get your ass in the car."

Bruce sighs, then walks to the other side of the car, opening the other door and getting in. "If you get us killed in this," he says, "I'll beat the shit out of you."

Brian drives down the road, sighing as he looks around. "Thank god the steering wheel isn't an Xbox controller," he says. "Where's the bridge? I want to head downtown."

"Should be over there." Bruce replies, pointing to the right.

"Ah, okay." Brian says, turning to his right, onto the bridge. He drives a bit faster, but stays at the same speed as the other cars. "So..." He says, unsure of what to say.

"...What?" Bruce replies, looking at him.

"...I don't know," he says, "just trying to see if I can start a conversation. Don't want this car ride to be boring."

"Ah. How do you think THQ managed to pull this off?"

"I honestly don't fucking know. They revolutionized gaming to a WHOLE new level though."

"Ain't that the truth..." Bruce says, looking out the window. "...Why are you driving so damn slow?"

"I don't want to get us killed?" Brian says, looking at Bruce. "Who knows what will happen if we do die."

"Makes sense," Bruce says. For the next few minutes, everything was silent between the two. As Brian takes the exit and drives into the city, he lowers his head slightly, irritated at how slow everyone drives in the city. "You know what," Brian says, speeding up. "Fuck it. They drive too damn slow."

"What are you doing?" Bruce asks as he looks forward.

"I'm driving faster." Brian says as he passes three cars.

"Brian, I swear to god!" Bruce yells, pushing his back further into the car seat. "Slow down!" But Brian doesn't listen. He continues to drive at the highest speed down the road. After a few seconds of driving down the same road, he turns left, pulling the handbreak and drifting. He realizes soon after that he drifted too late, as he sees the car is about to turn into a support beam of the railroad. Both of them scream as the car rams into the beam, throwing Brian out the window and smashing Bruce's head into the dashboard with a grunt. Brian hit the pavement, skidding across the road and leaving a trail of blood five feet long behind him.

"Oh thank god I had my seatbelt on," Bruce groans out as he raises his head from the dashboard. His vision was blurred; he couldn't tell what was going on around him. He wipes his eyes and blinks a bit, clearing his vision and noticing a bald syndicate member smashed between he car and the beam. He immediately jerks his head back, disgusted at the body, then looks to his left, noticing Brian wasn't in the car. "...Brian?"

Brian didn't respond. Bruce weakly opens the door, stepping out of the car with a grunt. He looks to the front of the car and notices the blood trail. He follows it with his eyes and notices Brian, motionless and face-down on the road. "Oh shit." Bruce says, limping over. "Great... Of course, out of all places, you die in a GAME. A GAME, Brian! You know, I'm not even surprised at this."

"You should be..." Brian groans out, rolling onto his back. "Not dead yet..."

"Oh..." Bruce says, staring at Brian. "You're a fucking dumbass."

"I do my best..." He replies, chuckling. Bruce just stares at him, angry and hurt. Brian stares back with a bloody grin, then sighs. "If I don't make it," He starts, "tell Kinzie I said hi when you meet her..."

"Get your ass up Brian," Bruce says in a pissed off tone.

"I don't think I can get up," he grunts out, still in massive pain. Bruce leans down, grabbing his hand and pulling him up. Brian gets up with his help, wiping the blood off of his face and looking around. "Thank-" was all he could say as Bruce swings a hard right hook into his jaw, throwing him back to the ground. Blackness soon followed for Brian.

* * *

Brian stirs, groaning as he opens his eyes. He notices weapons lying around, so he could tell that he was back at the safehouse. "About time you woke up." Shaundi says.

"What the fuck happened..." Brian says, rubbing his jaw.

"I knocked you out." Bruce replies.

"Gravy..." Brian says, sitting up. He grunts slightly, grabbing his head as he looks over to Bruce and Shaundi, who were standing next to the fireplace. Shaundi still seemed pissed off. "Surprising to see you here, Shaundi," Brian says.

"Your friend invited me over," she replies, "said it was boring just to wait for you to wake."

"Of course," Brian says, "and Bruce, the next time you fucking knock me out again, I'll kick your ass."

"I smacked the white off of you, Brian," he replies. "Plus, you deserved it."

"Yeah, I guess I did..." He says as he stands. "I'll make sure that I hit the support beam harder next time."

"Brian," Shaundi says, "what did you mean earlier?"

"What do you mean?" He asks, looking at her.

"How you ended up in a game? What the fuck did that mean?"

Brian thinks for a minute. "...Nothing," he says, "or, at least I think..."

"What?" She replies.

Brian shrugs. "Anyways, I bet you just want to shoot someone right now, so we won't waste your time anymore."

Shaundi nods, then walks over to the door, opening it and walking through.

"You honestly think I'm going to tell Kinzie you said hi?" Bruce asks.

"What," Brian asks, "I can't have my last rites?"

"I wouldn't be surprised at all if you tried your luck on her."

"Hey," Brian says with a grin as he walks over to him, "this addon pack just made A LOT of things possible. Hell, I know you would test your luck on your favorite female character."

"I guess I know what you mean," Bruce replies.

"Oh," Brian continues, "and by the way..."

"...What?"

Brian quickly grabs Bruce by both of his shoulders, striking him in the gut with his knee. Bruce grunts, jumping slightly backwards by the force and falling onto his knees, clenching his gut. "You're an asshole." Brian says.

"Why..." Bruce grunts out, slowly getting up.

"You knocked my ass on the floor, almost killing me. You deserved that much."

Bruce sighs as he leans on the wall, holding his gut. "I think you took it out of proportion again, but I guess you're right..."

"Oh well," Brian says, pulling out his phone. "Time to progress through the game."

"I guess so." Bruce says as Brian puts the phone up to his ear.

"How's the crew settling in?" Brian asks as the phone stops ringing.

"Man," Pierce says, "we gotta get a new place. That studio shit ain't working at all."

"Aw," Brian replies, "someone missing his posh hotels already?"

Pierce chuckles. "I can't help it that the rest of the world treats the saints right."

"We shouldn't get soft because of it, Pierce."

"I hear ya... Listen, how about you and me roll around the city to see what Steelport has to offer?"

"Sounds good. Meet us at the park, we'll pick you up." Brian says, ending the call and stuffing his phone into his pocket.

"You're repeating the dialogue in this game with your own style," Bruce says, pushing himself off the wall, "aren't you..."

"Best if we play along so that we don't create a time paradox in this game," Brian says, "right?"

"Makes sense..."

"Well, lets go," Brian says as they both walk out.

* * *

Bruce and Brian turn around as they hear a car pulling in, noticing Pierce driving the car. He stops in front of them, opening the driver door and walking out. "This car could use a little tuning," he says. "Lets find a Rim Jobs and get it cleaned up."

"Sounds good," Brian says as he walks over to the car, getting into the drivers seat. Pierce sits in the passenger seat, next to Brian as Bruce sits in the back. He puts the car in reverse, driving out of the park and down the road.

"Shaundi's taking this thing with Gat pretty hard," Pierce says.

"Hell, everyone is, Pierce," Brian replies.

"I know," he says, "but you're always pissed off. Our girl's not as crazy as you."

"Don't worry about it. We'll keep an eye on Shaundi."

For the next few moments, the car was silent. Brian stops at the stop light when Pierce looks at him. "How long were you rolling with Gat, anyway?" He asks.

"For a long time," Brian replies. "He was there before I even joined the Saints."

"Shit," Pierce says, "what was he like back then?"

"He mellowed with age," Brian replies. "Until Aisha died..."

"Yeah," Bruce says, "then he was madder than hell."

Brian turns right, driving down another road. He picks up his speed, driving past cars a bit faster. He sighs as he looks out his window, watching as he passes each car. He then looks forward, turning right again, into the Rim Jobs.

"Lets do this," Brian says as he drives into the garage.

* * *

"Of course, you painted it purple," Bruce complains as Brian pulls out of the garage.

"Car's got more style," Pierce says, "now it's our turn."

"Are you kidding me Pierce?" Bruce asks. "Brian does this shit ALL the time."

"What," Pierce replies, "don't like the color?"

"He paints the car fucking purple everytime he gets one," Bruce says. "Why can't you just paint it fucking green, or blue, Brian?"

"And look like the other gangs?" Brian asks. "No. I like it purple."

"Of course you do," Bruce says as he stares out the window.

"Can we just head to Planet Saints please?" Pierce interrupts.

"Sounds good to me." Brian says as he drives down the road.

"Are you going to paint your shirts purple, too?" Bruce asks sarcastically.

"Nothing wrong with wanting to look good." Pierce replies, looking at Bruce.

"I'm good," he says.

"Oh whatever," Pierce says with a grin, turning around. "We need some driving music."

"Lets see what we can find," Brian says as Pierce flips through the channels. Of course, he knew what was going to come up, as the familiar drum beat starts playing.

"Ah-ha-ha yeah," Pierce says, grinning.

"Oh-ho-ho shit, turn it up," Brian says, grinning as well.

"Hey, you remember this," Pierce responds, lightly bumping Brian's shoulder as the guitar plays.

"Dude," Brian says, "This was like, no this IS my high school."

"Early in the morning," all three sing in unison, "rising to the street. Light me up that cigarette, and I strap shoes on my feet."

"Beeb-be-be-be-beep," Brian sings out as Pierce chuckles.

"Got to find a reason," they all start again, "a reason things went wrong. Got to find a reason why my money's all gone."

"Because you stole it!" Brian sings out, even though its not part of the song.

"I got a Dalmatian," Bruce and Pierce sing.

"Got-a-mation!" Brian sings.

"And I can still get high," Bruce and Pierce sing.

"I still get high." Brian sings.

"I can play the guitar like a mother-fucking riot!" They all sing in unison again, laughing as the guitar plays.

"Now life is -" Bruce stops himself, "Fucking shit, happens everytime."

"C'mon, man," Pierce says, looking at Bruce, "Get into it! C'mon."

"Well life is too short," they all sing, "so love the one you got, 'cuz you might get run over or you might get, shot. Never start static, I just get it off my chest. Never had to battle with no bulletproof vest. Take a small example, take a tip from me. Take all your money, give it all to charity. Love is what I got, it's within my reach. And the Sublime style's still straight from long beach. It all comes back to you, you'll finally get what you deserve. You try and test that, you're bound to get served. Love's what I got. Don't start a riot. You feel it when the dance gets hot."

"Woo- hoo!" Brian shouts.

"Sing it!" Pierce says as he looks at Brian.

"Lovin'," Brian sings, "is what I got! I said remember that!"

"Lovin'," Bruce sings, "is what I got! I said remember that!"

"Lovin'," Pierce sings, "is what I got! I said remember that!"

"Lovin'," they all sing, "is what I got!" Pierce chuckles after they sing.

"Why I don't cry when my dog runs away," Brian sings.

"I don't get angry at the bills I have to pay," Bruce sings.

"I don't get angry when my mom smokes pot," Pierce sings, "hits the bottle and goes right into the rock." He chuckles.

"Fucking and fighting," Brian sings, "it's all the same."

"Living with Louie dog's the only way to stay sane," Bruce sings.

"Let the lovin'," they all join in, "let the lovin' come back to me..." Pierce and Brian chuckles as he turns left.

"Oh, there you are," Brian says.

"Hey," Pierce replies, "you act like you are singing better."

"That'd be hilarious if we stopped at a red light and the guys next to us looked and said 'the fuck?'" Brian says.

"Come on, man!" Pierce says, looking at Bruce.

"Last chorus," Brian says, "Ready?"

"You can do it," Pierce responds, "come on!"

"Lovin'," Bruce starts, "is what I got! I said remember that!"

"Lovin'," Brian and Pierce sing, "Now you!" Pierce points at Brian.

"Is what I got!" Brian sings.

"I said remember that!" Pierce continues.

"I said remember that!" Brian says as he hits a morning star member with the car. "REMEMBER IT!"

"Lovin', everybody!" Pierce sings.

"Is what I got!" Brian and Bruce join in, "I said remember that! Lovin', is what I got! I got! I got! I got!" They all chuckle as Brian pulls up to the Planet Saints store.

"Hey you could at least smile while you're singing," Pierce says, looking at Brian, "come on!"

"I am smiling!" Brian replies, chuckling.

"Pay me," Pierce says as the song stops, "that was a concert. Pay me!"

"Come on," Bruce says, opening the door and getting out, "let's get inside."

"Alright," Brian replies as he and Pierce get out.

* * *

Brian slips on the white tee shirt as he looks at what he's now wearing: light blue twenty-first century jeans and a pair of white and grey jumps. He nods with a small grin as he looks at Bruce. "Not going to buy something to wear?" he asks.

"I don't like much in this store," he replies.

"Alright," Brian says.

"Time to go," Pierce says as he turns around, noticing a huge brute running into the store. "...What the fuck is that thing?!"

"Oh fuck!" Brian says, unholstering his Shepard and aiming at the brute. The brute runs up to Pierce first, uppercutting him over the store counter. "Shit! Kill this damn thing!"

"Working on it!" Bruce says as he unslings his K6 Kurkov. They both start firing at the brute, but it kept running. It runs into Brian, throwing him to the floor. He then grabs him by the neck, pulling him up as he aims his Shepard at its head.

"DIE!" Brian yells as he fires round after round into the brute. Unphased by the rounds, it swings his fist into Brian's gut three times. Brian loses his grip on the pistol, groaning as the brute throws him across the room, into a few shirt racks.

"I STRONGEST!" The brute yells. Bruce loads a fresh mag into his K6, reaiming at the brute. He squeezes the trigger, holding it down as the brute turns around. "YOU DIE!" It yells as it runs up to Bruce, throwing him to the ground. As he looks up, the brute raises its foot over Bruce's head. Bruce closes his eyes, bracing for the worse...

But nothing happened to him. He hears the brute yell, stumbling around. As he opens his eyes and looks over, he notices Brian, clinging onto the brutes back. "The Shepard!" Brian yells. "Throw it to me!"

Bruce wastes no time. He grabs the Shepard off the ground and throws it at Brian. He catches it by the barrel, flips it to where he's holding the handle, then aims it into the back of its head, pulling the trigger. The brute drops onto a knee, tossing Brian forward, off of his back. He grunts as he hits the ground, quickly getting back up. Turning to the brute, he sprints into it with his entire body, throwing the weakened brute onto its back. He gets up, aiming his Shepard into his chin and pulling the trigger until he brutes head explodes on the third shot. "AND STAY DOWN!" Brian yells. After a few moments, Brian falls off the brute, hitting the floor hard with a grunt as he clenches his gut. He then pukes on the floor as Bruce walks over.

"You alright, Brian?" He asks.

Brian groans. "I just got punched three times in the gut by a brute. How do you think I feel?" He pukes again on the floor.

"Like shit," Bruce replies, "I can tell. On a scale of one to ten, how bad did that hurt?"

"Eleven..." Pierce grunts out as he gets up from behind the counter. "That big fucker wasn't normal."

"It's a god damn brute..." Brian groans out as he slowly gets up. "They're built like that..."

"I've seen some scary motherfuckers," Pierce says, "but the way he was shrugging off bullets..."

"Yeah, it's not right..." Brian says, leaning on a mannequin. "At least this one's dead..."

"This one?" Pierce asks, scratching his head. "There's more?"

"Lots more," Brian replies, looking around. As he looks outside, he notices morning star members rushing up to he exit. One member stops, aiming his Shepard at Brian and squeezing the trigger, blowing the mannequin's head next to him.

"Time to tip on out of here," Pierce says as he grabs his K6.

"Yeah," Bruce replies as he aims his K6 over to the door. Brian pushes himself off the mannequin, turning around and aiming his Shepard. The three start firing, dropping the members one by one. Brian runs through the entrance, grabbing the nearest morning star member and using him as a human shield. He aims to the member at his right, shifting his human shield to that direction and shooting the member in the head. He then grabs the shield's Shepard from his holster, kicking him forward and shooting him twice in the back. The member falls to his knees as Bruce and Pierce run out, spraying down the rest of the morning stars. Brian aims his Shepard at the man's head, pulling the trigger. His head recoils forward, falling limp on the ground.

"I'm impressed!" Pierce yells as he blind fires over the car.

"Lets get out of here?!" Bruce yells as he gets into the back of the car.

"Oh, right!" Brian replies, running over and jumping into the driver seat. Pierce slides over the hood over the car, jumping into the passenger seat as Brian presses down on the pedal, speeding off.

* * *

"That was a horrible experience..." Bruce says as he stares in the fridge.

"No doubt," Brian replies, laying on the couch and looking over to Bruce. "What are you doing?"

"Looking for food," Bruce says, pushing bottle to the side. "Does this guy just have beer in his fucking fridge or what?"

"I wouldn't be surprised if its all booze," Brian says, sighing as he looks at his phone. "It is Shaundi's ex's place after all."

"Yeah," Bruce replies, "Oh well. Know if there's a Freckle Bitches around anywhere?"

"There isn't one in this game," Brian says, "They took it out."

"Are you serious?" Bruce asks, looking at Brian. "Damnit."

"Eh, we can head to Tits N' Grits tomorrow," Brian says as he scrolls through the music section on his phone, "Or Smiling Jack's diner. For now, lets get some sleep. Tomorrow, we get a real place to sleep in for once."

"Yeah," Bruce replies, looking at the bedroom door. "See ya in the morning... Surprising that THQ pulled something this big off. It feels real..." He yawns, walking to the door and opening it. He walks into the room, closing the door behind him. Brian sighs as he stares up at the ceiling fan, then closes his eyes a moment later. "Jesus..." He mutters, resting the right side of his head on the arm of the couch.

**HOLY SHIT, these two stories have been collecting dust for a year now. Sorry about that ****absence, but I had a lot of shit come up. I completely forgot about this (either that, or I never felt like writing more to these stories at all). Anyways, I'm back. I'm going to work more on this until I get to Chapter 5, then I'll start working on The Grieving Saint once they both are equal on chapters. Once again, sorry about this LONG absence. Hopefully this chapter will make up for it, yes? Hoped you liked it. Feels good to be back.**


	4. Party Crashers

**I don't own no damn Third Saints Row!**

"What can I get you to drink?" The waitress asks, holding up a notepad and a pen.

Bruce looks at the fridge. "A Joe Cola, please." he says.

The waitress nods, writing down something on her notepad. "And you?" She asks, looking at Brian.

Brian doesn't respond. He stares out the window, glancing at the entrance of the diner every five seconds, paranoid that a squad of deckers may come in and gun them down.

"Sir?" The waitress asks again.

"Brian," Bruce says, pushing him lightly on his shoulder.

"Oh-oh sorry," he says, looking at the waitress, "just a bit paranoid."

"We all are," the waitress replies, "now what can I get you to drink?"

"Can I get coffee, please?" Brian asks, glancing at the exit.

"Alright," she replies. "You two ready to order or do you want to look at the menu some more?"

"We're not ready yet," Bruce says. The waitress nods, walking away as Bruce looks at Brian. "What the hell are you paranoid about?" He asks.

"Oh, you know," Brian responds, "Deckers, cops, brutes... Just the usual shit."

"We haven't done anything to piss them off yet, so why worry?"

"Look at us; we're inside of Smiling Jack's diner, which is small, asses planted in a booth and ordering food. We're easy, unsuspecting targets for the deckers right now."

"My god, you ARE paranoid, Brian."

"I have good reason to be paranoid right now."

"Well, don't fucking jinx us," Bruce replies, looking at the waitress as she walks back over, placing the drinks on the table.

"You two ready?" She asks.

"Yeah," Brian says, "can I get two eggs scrambled and some bacon, please?"

"Alright," she says, looking at Bruce, "And you?"

"I'll have the same," Bruce replies.

"Okay, one moment," she says, walking away. Brian looks back out of the window as a decker van stops at a red light. The driver turns his head to the right, noticing Brian and staring at him. Brian stares back, leaning closer to the window.

"What are you doing?" Bruce asks as he looks at the van.

"Staring contest." Brian replies, squinting his eyes.

"Oh god..." Bruce groans, lowering his head. The decker squints his eyes as well, still staring at Brian. After a moment, the light turns green, and the van drives off. "Thank god," Bruce says, sighing in relief.

"Here you two go," the waitress says as she puts the plates on the table. As she walks off, the two stare at their food.

"Well," Brian starts, "Bon appetite?" He grabs a bacon strip off the plate, hesitantly placing it in his mouth. He chews the bacon, raising an eyebrow. "Holy shit," he says as he chews, "it tastes like bacon."

"Really?" Bruce asks, looking at the bacon. He grabs it off the plate, staring at it for a moment. He takes a bite out of it, chewing the piece in his mouth. "Huh," he says, looking at the bacon.

"We now know we have all five senses," Brian says, taking another bite out of the bacon.

"Yeah," Bruce replies, doing the same as Brian. As they continue to eat, two decker members walk into the diner, armed with a Shepard and a K6. They walk up to the booth Brian and Bruce were sitting at, and one member presses the Shepard into the back of Brian's head. As Bruce goes to stand up, the other decker aims the K6 at him. "Don't move," he demands.

"Gravy..." Brian groans, not moving.

"You shouldn't have stared at me like that, saint," the decker with the Shepard growls.

"Well," Brian replies, "you shouldn't have accepted my staring contest. You're at fault here."

The decker growls lowly, raising his Shepard and slamming it into the back of Brian's skull. Brian's head recoils down, hitting the table hard with a grunt as the decker aims the Shepard into his temple. "Shut up," he says.

Brian chuckles, slowly reaching for his Shepard. "Aw, someone realizes his fatal mistake here?" He asks in a comical manner.

"Oh?" The decker says, lowering his head to Brian's. "And what might that be?"

"The safety's on, asshole..."

"What?" The decker asks, looking at his gun. "No it's n-"

Brian smacks the Shepard off of his head, unholstering his Shepard and aiming it at the decker. He pulls the trigger, watching as the deckers head recoils back, falling onto the floor limp as a ragdoll. As the other decker aims his K6 at Brian, Bruce quickly gets up from the booth, grabbing the gun and head-butting the guy. He then turns him around and holds him as a human shield as he unslings his K6 Kurkov.

"Well then," Brian says, getting out the booth. "Wasn't expecting you to do that."

"Surprising, right?" Bruce replies.

"How many more do you think are out there?" Brian asks.

"Two specialists," the decker says. "That's pretty much it..."

"Thanks, cyber prick." Bruce says.

"Welp," Brian says as he aims his Shepard at the decker's head, pulling the trigger. "We don't need him anymore."

"What the hell, man?!" Bruce says as he lets go of the dead decker. "Why'd you do that?"

"They're decker specialists," Brian responds. "They can flank us easily with their dual wielding sub-machine guns. Oh, and they have hyper-speed roller skates."

"Hyper what now?" Bruce asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Just come outside," Brian replies, walking to the exit. As they walk outside, they notice two girls in neon blue miniskirts, wearing ripped fishnet stockings and roller skates.

"Woah," Bruce says, staring at them.

"Oh yeah," Brian starts, "did I forget to mention that they're hot, too?"

"This is going to be more fun for us than it will be for you two..." One of the specialists says, grinning.

"It's easy to just charge up at them and throw the to the ground," Brian says, looking at Bruce. "How do you want to play this one out?" As he says this, the two specialists make their move, skating at fast speeds. Brian sprints to his left, yelling out as he dives onto one of the specialists, causing them both to crash through the diner window.

"Oh shit!" Bruce yells, raising his K6 as the specialist strafes to his right. She slides on her knees, firing her D4TH BLOSSOMs in Bruce's direction. Bruce dives forward, shifting his gun to the right and firing back at the specialist. She jumps, doing a backflip as she lands on her skates. Bruce quickly stumbles to his feet as the specialists skates to his left. She spins, shooting at the same time in two different directions. Bruce crouches as the rounds fly over his head. The specialist notices this, skating towards him and tackling him onto he ground, aiming both of her D4THs at his head.

"You want it slow," the specialist says, "or quick?" She grins as she says this.

"I will be honest," Bruce says, "I'm not sure wether I should be scared, or turned on right now."

"I hoped you had a-" she stops, eyes widening as she blushes heavily.

"Yeah," he chuckles nervously, "sorry about that..."

Brian stumbles out of the diner, holding his bleeding arm as he notices the specialist on top of Bruce. He crouches down, walking over somewhat silently to the two as the specialist notices him, aiming her D4THs a him. Bruce, not sure on how he should react, aims his K6 at Brian at the same time as the specialist. Brian jumps back, shooting his arms into the air. "Woah, woah!" Brian yells. "Take it easy!"

"I-I think easy is an u-understatement right now," Bruce stutters as the specialist reaims one of her D4THs at him. "It-It's really hard..."

"What do you me-" Brian stops himself, noticing the specialist blushing hard. Her expression was one of surprise and disturbed at the same time. "Oh..." Brian says, eyes widening as he realizes what's going on. After a moment of an awkward silence, Brian grins. "Ba-dum dssssh." He says, acting like he's playing a set of drums.

"A-are you serious right now?!" The decker yells, staring at Brian.

"Well, so much for breakfast, right Brian?" Bruce asks, looking at Brian.

"Yeah," Brian replies, grin growing wider. "She got her breakfast sausage alright."

"Shut up..." The decker responds, lowering her face. Her shoulders start shaking, as if she was laughing silently.

"Hey," Brian says, looking at her, "at the end of he day, rape is just the word pear, jumbled up in a different order."

The decker's shoulders still continue to shake in a laughing manner. She lowers her guns, still keeping her head lowered as they drop out of her hands. Brian notices this and takes it to his advantage: he walks over, swinging his foot right into her nose. She recoils back with a grunt, flying off of Bruce and hitting the floor hard, unconscious. "There we go," Brian says, looking at Bruce.

"Come on," Bruce says, staring at Brian. "I was enjoying that."

"Too bad," Brian replies. "Now lets get out of here before more deckers show up."

Bruce sighs, "Alright..." He says, getting up.

* * *

Brian pulls his phone out of his pocket as he drives on the bridge, opening the missions app and pressing on Pierce's contact. He puts the phone up to his ear as the phone starts ringing. "Glad you called," Pierce says as the phone stops ringing. "I think I found us a new place..."

Brian sighs. "Aren't you suppose to be looking for Loren," he asks, "not going house hunting?"

"See," Pierce replies, "that's the beauty of this place - it's owned by the Morningstar."

"Alright, I'm listening."

"The Morningstar have a penthouse downtown where they're throwing a big party for their global contacts."

"And their real-estate agent will be there, right?" Brian asks sarcastically.

"Real funny..." Pierce replies. "I was going to say we crash the party, kill the Morningstar, and keep the place for the Saints, Ha."

"I'm in," Brian says, "Plan?"

"The Saints will be downstairs until you can unlock the elevator for them to come up," Pierce says.

"And we'll be BASE jumping from a helicopter into the penthouse, right?"

"That's right," Pierce replies. "Meet us at the airport." He hangs up after he says this.

"Well," Bruce says, "this should be fun."

"Yep," Brian replies, chuckling as he takes a left. "Okay, here's the plan: I want you to land on the rooftop and provide me cover fire as I interrogate the Morningstar member for the elevator code. As soon as I get inside the building, make your way down to me and we'll keep going from there."

"Sounds good," Bruce says, staring out the window.

"Hope you're ready," Brian says, pulling into the airport.

* * *

Brian leans out the helicopter, holding onto a railing with one hand. He uses his free hand to move the binoculars to his eyes, getting a closer view of the penthouse. He notices a lot of Morningstar members outside the pool area, along with strippers and normal bystanders. One stripper dives into the pool as Brian looks at the helipad, which is clear of people.

"Whatchu thinkin'?" Pierce asks as Bruce hangs out the helicopter with Brian.

"...Someone's in our pool," Brian replies.

"Crew's ready downstairs," Shaundi says, "just say the word and we'll crash the party."

"Lets do this..." Brian says, tossing the binoculars into the helicopter.

"Alright, you're clear!" Pierce yells out.

"I hope you're ready for this Bruce," Brian says, looking at him.

"Ready when you are," Bruce replies. Brian nods, then looks back down to the penthouse one last time. He nods, quickly glancing at Bruce.

"Go!" He yells. Both Bruce and Brian jump out of the helicopter, diving straight for the penthouse. "Better than trying to fly through a plane," Brian mutters to himself as he pulls the string on his chute, decreasing his decent speed and gliding onto the helipad. He botches his landing, falling onto the floor with a grunt. Groaning, he gets up, rubbing his head as he notices Bruce land on the rooftop. He unslings his K6 as he gets up from his botched landing, crouching over the edge of the roof. He nods at Brian, indicating that he's ready. Brian nods back, pulling out his phone and calling Shaundi.

"Shaundi, we're in," Brian says. "As soon as I find someone with the elevator code, I'll unlock it."

"Just give the word, Brian." Shaundi replies. As Brian puts his phone away, he unholsters his Shepard, running up the stairs. He sprints to his right, jumping and tackling a Morningstar member to the ground. As he cocks his pistol, he aims it at the man's head. "What's the code to the freight elevator?" Brian demands.

"Go to hell!" The member replies as Brian pulls himself and the member up to his feet.

"Oh, I love it when people say that..." Brian replies, squinting his eyes and grinning at the man. Another Morningstar member charges up to Brian, raising her K6's butt stock to strike. As she runs up, four rounds pierce her torso, moving up until one pierces her head. She falls to her right, limp like a ragdoll as she hits the ground.

"Fine," the member gives in. "Code's three-one-three-one. Just watch the jacket..."

"Thank you," Brian says, turning him around and holding him as a human shield. As he turns to the penthouse, he notices the Morningstar members grabbing the closest bystander to them and using them as human shields, firing at Brian. "Damn," he says, "they're making this harder for me..." As he moves to his left, he starts firing back at the Morningstar, managing to hit some of them in the head. Bruce, who is still on the rooftop, fires down from behind, taking out the Morningstar without harming the bystanders in the process. As he shoots one member near the pool, him holding a stripper as a shield, he the member falls forward, sending both him and the stripper into the pool.

As Brian goes to shoot one of the members who was holding a stripper as a shield, the shield he held jerks his head to the right, hitting Brian's Shepard. His aim goes off as he fires, and instead he shoots the stripper. The member then lets go as Brian reaims, firing again and hitting a clean headshot on the member. He watches as the man recoils backwards, hitting the ground hard as he goes limp. A stray round hits Brian's human shield in the chest, causing him to grunt loudly.

"I said watch the jacket!" The shield yells.

"Can it, asshole," Brian responds, kicking him next to the pool. Before the member could react, Brian shoots him in the back of the head, causing the man to recoil forward into the crimson red pool. Brian pants slightly as he notices all the members are dead, inside the penthouse and at the pool, then looks up at Bruce. They both nod at each other as Brian walks around the pool, into the penthouse.

"Damn," Brian says, "Pierce DID pick a nice place for the crew..." As he continues walking, he hears glass shattering above him. When he stops and looks up, he notices Bruce jumping from the broken glass ceiling, bouncing off the couch and hitting the floor hard with a grunt.

"Oh, not my brightest idea..." Bruce groans out, rolling into his back and looking at Brian.

"Get up," Brian responds, extending his arm to Bruce. He takes his arm, pulling himself up as he rubs his head with his other hand. He then looks around, walking over and grabbing his K6 off the floor.

"Alright..." Bruce says, loading a fresh mag into his K6. "Where to now?"

"Downstairs," Brian replies, loading a fresh mag into his Shepard as they walk to the storage room stairs. As the walk down the stairs, they notice a wall of barrels blocking their way into the next room, along with some conveniently-placed hand grenades on the floor.

"Great..." Bruce groans as he looks at the barrels.

"How convenient," Brian says as he grabs a hand grenade. "Don't worry, Bruce. Nothing some explosives can't handle."

"I don't trust you with grenades," Bruce replies.

"Then you better stand back," Brian says as he pulls the pin off of a grenade, tossing it at the wall of barrels. They both run for cover, jumping behind some crates and pallets as the grenade explodes, sending the barrels flying. One barrel hits a Morningstar member, killing her instantly as she and the barrel hit the floor.

"What the hell's going on over there?" A Morningstar member says, turning around and noticing Brian and Bruce sprinting in, firing and dropping member after member.

"Look at all this shit!" Brian says as he takes cover behind a pile of sheet metal.

"Yeah," Bruce replies, taking cover as well. "No way they're giving this up without a fight!" As he says this, he moves from cover, advancing slowly as he fires at he remaining Morningstar members. He shoots the propane tank, watching as it explodes, sending shrapnel into the few remaining members that stand.

Brian walks over to the elevator, punching in the numbers 3, 1, 3, and 1 into the keypad. "Ready to crash the party?" Brian says, swapping mags in his Shepard.

"We're coming up," Shaundi replies over the intercoms, "keep the door clear." As she says this, three Morningstar members run down, firing K6s' at Brian and Bruce. They instantly drop into cover. Bruce raises his K6 over his head, blind-firing and taking out one of the three members. Brian pops up from cover, shooting a second member in the head before shifting his attention to the third. Bruce pops out if cover as well, and the two fire at the last member, unloading all of their mags into the man's chest as he hits the ground.

"Talk about an over-kill," Brian says as he loads a fresh mag into his Shepard.

"I know, right?" Bruce replies, chuckling as he swaps mags. The elevator doors open behind the two, letting Shaundi and seven other Saints into the storage room.

"What's the plan here?" Shaundi asks as she looks at Brian.

"Kill the rest of these assholes!" Brian yells back.

"Easy enough," Shaundi replies, taking the squad of Saints up the stairs. As Brian and Bruce follow, they notice a helicopter landing on the helipad, dropping more Morningstar members off. "Brian, guys are getting dropped off outside!" Shaundi yells out.

"Great..." Brian says, shooting a Morningstar member in the head.

"They shouldn't fuck with you!" A Saint yells at Brian. As they head outside, Brian and Bruce fire on the Morningstar crowded on the helipad, dropping them one by one. Brian sprints up to one, jumping into the air and pulling his arm back, clenching his hand into a fist. He yells as he swings a hard right hook into the member's jaw, throwing him to the ground as Brian hits the ground with a grunt. He aims his Shepard quickly at the member, shooting him in the head before he could get up. Brian gets up, shaking his hand a bit as he winces in pain.

"Jeez, that hurt," he says, looking back at the penthouse. "Shaundi, how's it going?"

"Good news," Shaundi starts, "we've cleared them out. Bad news: the boys are saying this place is rigged to blow."

"Well, shit..." Bruce says, walking up.

"Where's that guy in the helicopter going?" Shaundi asks, pointing into the air at the helicopter.

"He probably knows how to disarm this place," Brian replies.

"Then try not to kill him," Shaundi says as Brian jumps into the helicopter.

"Four thousand says you have to cut the red wire- Aw, shit..."

"You're on," Shaundi says.

"What?" Bruce asks, opening the co-pilot door.

"Now I kinda wish it was an Xbox controller..." Brian replies, staring at the stick.

"Oh god..." Bruce says. "Now I DON'T trust you flying."

"I don't either," Brian responds. "So you're going to stay here with Shaundi."

"Alright," Bruce says. "Why keep me here, though?"

"Because if I crash this bird," Brian starts, "then at least only one of us dies."

"Right," Bruce says, closing the door and stepping back.

"Well," Brian says, grabbing the stick, "here goes nothing..." As he says this, he raises the helicopter in the sky about a few feet. "Woah, Jesus..." Brian says, not use to the swaying of the helicopter. He takes a breath in as he hovers in the air. "Alright..." Brian says, pushing the stick forward. "Lets go forwa-AAAHHHHH!" He yells as he falls below the helipad. "PULL UP! PULL UP!" He pulls the stick back, pulling the helicopter at a perfect angle of attack. He starts moving forward as he first intended to. Not wanting to fall again, he holds the stick tightly in place.

* * *

"BRIAN!" Shaundi yells as the helicopter falls beneath the helipad, running to the edge.

"Yep," Bruce says, shaking his head. "I kinda figured..."

She shoots an evil glare at him. "HE COULD BE DEAD RIGHT NOW!" She yells at him.

"Oh wow," Bruce says, pointing. "I'm surprised he's actually flying FORWARD now."

Shaundi looks back over the helipad, noticing Brian chasing after the other helicopter. She sighs in relief. "Oh thank god..."

"I'm surprised he's not dead," Bruce says, "But I don't think he'll survive..."

She stares at him. "My god, you're an asshole..."

"Hey, I'm just saying," Bruce replies, shrugging. "Besides, I wasn't the one who crashed a car into a pillar."

* * *

"Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck," Brian repeats rapidly as he continues to fly towards the other helicopter. "Alright, the pedals can help me steer this thing, so I should be good on turning... I think."

The Morningstar helicopter suddenly steers left, causing Brian to gulp as he pushes down on the left pedal. As he pushes it down, the helicopter jerks hard to the left, almost throwing Brian out of his seat. "Woah, holy shit!" Brian yells as he situates himself back in his seat. "Well, thank god I'm still-oh shit." He says as he notices the helicopter tries to lose him by flying in between a few industrial mill pipes.

"Oh, fuck that!" Brian yells, flying up and over the industrial area while still tailing the helicopter. He pulls out his phone, pressing on Shaundi's contact and pulling the phone up quickly to his ear.

"Hey, Shaundi," hey says, laughing hysterically, "got the place cleaned up yet?"

"What do I look like," Shaundi replies, "the damn maid?"

"So that's a n-no then?" Brian replies.

"We're sitting on a bomb here and you're making jokes?" Shaundi says, slightly irritated.

"Hey," Brian starts, still laughing hysterically. "I'm flying a helicopter right n-now. Both of our lives are i-in danger as we speak. L-lighten up, Shaundi!"

"You can't be serious!" She yells.

"Well jeez," Brian says, watching the helicopter fly out of the industrial area. "Someone needs to take a fucking nap!" As he puts the phone back in his pocket, he lowers the helicopter back to the same height level as the other. "I'm still on ya..." Brian says, still holding the stick. "Shouldn't get worse from here..."

As he says that, he notices Morningstar members armed with RPGs on rooftops. One of them fires a rocket directly at Brian. "WELL, I JUST FUCKING HAD TO SAY SOMETHING!" He yells as he kicks the left pedal, jerking the helicopter to the left as he barley dodges the rocket. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" Brian yells, raising the helicopter and dodging another rocket. "AMATEUR TRYING TO FLY HERE!" As he lowers the helicopter, he notices the Morningstar helicopter landed at a warehouse.

"Oh great..." Brian says, sighing. "Landing..." He lowers the helicopter more to the ground as he approaches the warehouse. "Fuck this!" He yells, pushing the stick forward and nose-diving into the ground, skidding forward thirty feet as parts of the helicopter break and fly off. He jumps out of the helicopter, landing on the floor hard with a grunt as it skids further, exploding as it hits the wall. Brian gets up, groaning as he rubs his head. "I can't believe I survived that..." He says, looking over at the warehouse.

Two Morningstar members get out of the helicopter, one running to the entrance of the warehouse. "Oh no you don't!" Brian says, sprinting after the man. As the second Morningstar member raises her K6, Brian quickly draws his Shepard and shoots her directly in the head, not slowing down as he continues to sprint. As he catches up, he tackles the member hard before he is able to run in. Brian gets up quickly, pulling the man up to his feet as he aims the gun at his head.

"How do I defuse the bomb?!" Brian demands, giving the man a deranged look.

"THE RED WIRE!" He yells, scared. "CUT THE RED WIRE!"

"Good boy..." Brian says, shooting the member in the head. The body recoils backward, hitting the floor hard as Brian pulls out his phone. He presses Shaundi's contact, putting the phone up to his ear.

"Shaundi, cut the red wire," Brian says, walking away from the warehouse.

"Damn," Shaundi curses to herself. "I lost the bet..."

"You're damn right," Brian says, putting his phone away. He walks up to the helicopter, staring at it. "Fuck me..." He says, opening the pilot seat door.

* * *

"Here he comes," Shaundi says, walking over to the helipad as she notices Brian flying to the penthouse.

"Well, I'll be damned..." Bruce says, staring at the helicopter. "I'm surprised he's not dead."

"Quit being an ass!" She responds, glancing at him for a quick second.

"Hey, I'm just saying," he says, still staring at the helicopter. Brian continues to fly at the same speed, descending ever so slightly to align himself with the helipad. "Wait a minute..." Bruce says, squinting. "...He's not slowing down!"

As he says this, the helicopter crashes onto the helipad, sliding along it before smashing into a dead halt. Brian gets propelled forward hitting his head on the windshield, grunting and wincing in pain as he falls back into his seat, dazed and barley awake.

"Oh shit!" Shaundi yells, running up to the helicopter.

"Of course..." Bruce groans, "I had a feeling he'd do that..."

Shaundi opens the helicopter door, peaking her head inside. "Brian, are you okay!" She says, staring at him.

He barley opens his eyes, raising his head off the seat as he looks at Shaundi. "...Did I make it?" He asks weakly.

"Barley," she replies.

"Good..." Brian says, grinning weakly as he closes his eyes, resting his head back on the seat.

"He's fine," Bruce says, walking up.

"No he isn't!" Shaundi yells, glancing at him.

"Hey Brian," Bruce says.

"...What?" Brian says weakly, opening his eyes.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" He asks, raising up three fingers.

Brian opens his eyes. His vision was blurred and he couldn't tell what was going on around him. "...Red..." He says, closing his eyes again. His head falls back into the seat as he finally passes out.

"Yeah, he's fine." Bruce says, looking at Shaundi.

"He needs a doctor!" Shaundi yells, pushing herself off the helicopter to face Bruce.

"No," he replies, "he needs nothing, really. Just let him rest, he'll be fine in the morning."

"You can't be serious, Bruce!" She yells louder at him.

"...Ariel arrows, or kitty style..." Brian mumbles, causing both Bruce and Shaundi to stare at him. "...Eh, tough call..."

"What..." Shaundi says, staring at Brian.

"Like I said," Bruce responds, walking to the penthouse. "He'll be fine."

Shaundi sighs, staring a Brian. "What the fuck..." She mutters to herself, shaking her head.

**BOOM! Fourth Chapter. I kinda feel like I rushed on it a bit when I was typing this chapter up, but oh well. Hoped you guys enjoy this chapter.**


	5. Guardian Assholes

**I don't own Saints Row: The Third. Funny, right?**

Brian opens his eyes, looking around the room as he sits up. His vision was still a bit blurred. He rubs his eyes, clearing his vision slightly as he looks around again. Letting his head hang off his neck, he sighs as he rubs the back of his neck. "God damn..." Brian mutters to himself, looking behind himself at the Smiling Jack's painting. "...Funny."

He gets up, cracking his neck a few times as he stretches his arms out. "I need to learn how to fly..." he says, walking over to the bathroom door. He stops, raising an eyebrow as he looks back at the bed. "Wait a minute," he says, scratching his head. "How the fuck did I end up in the bed?" He stares at the bed for another moment before he shakes his head, sighing. "I'll figure out later..." He says, pushing the bathroom door open and walking in.

Walking over to the sink, Brian glances over to the toilet, noticing the iron mace hanging over it. He stops at the sink, still staring at the mace. "That can't be safe..." Brian says, shaking his head. "But then again, everywhere I go, people always want to kill me. Nowhere's safe." He turns on the sink, cupping his hands under the running water. He moves his hands up to his face, splashing the water on his face.

Brian sighs as he places his hands on the edge of the counter, looking up and staring at his reflection in the object. "How come I can't see myself well in this mirror-" he stops himself, looking at the object some more. "Oh, it's a TV..." He blinks, raising an eyebrow. "Now why the fuck is there a TV in the bathroom?" Brian asks himself. "Man, today's just full of questions..."

He walks out of the bathroom, walking over to the bedroom door when he glances at the little glass coffee table in the room. He notices a stack of money on it, wrapped up together and walks over to the table. He grabs it, counting the money as he raises an eyebrow. "Four thousand dollars?" Brian asks himself. "Oh... Thanks, Shaundi." He grins slightly, placing the cash in his pocket as he walks to the bedroom door, pushing it open and walking out.

Brian turns to his right as he steps out, walking down the stairs as he notices Bruce and Pierce talking next to a big pile of cash. Pierce turns his head to the stairs, noticing Brian coming down the stairs. "About time your ass woke up," Pierce says.

"Well sorry I don't know how to land a helicopter," Brian replies, rubbing the back of his head.

"Anyways," Pierce replies, tossing him a set of keys. "Check it out."

"Safety deposit keys," Brian says, examining the keys.

"Yep," Pierce says. "Since this used to be a Syndicate crib, I thought I'd poke around to see what they left behind. Now don't you wanna know what it is they got locked up?"

"They're going to know that we have the damn keys," Brian replies, tossing the keys back to Pierce. "They'll be waiting for us to act."

Pierce gets up from the couch. "Then I guess you two better watch my back," he says, glancing at Bruce.

"Alright," Brian replies, walking over to the coffee table and grabbing the pistol. "Lets go."

* * *

The helicopter rises from the helipad, flying from the penthouse and above the city. Brian and Bruce were sitting on different sides of the helicopter, back propped up against the wall. Brian leans his head out the side of the helicopter, watching as a purple car pulls out of the building's garage and speeds down the street. He pulls out his phone, pressing Pierce's contact and placing it onto his ear. "So," Brian starts, "going to get in there, grab the stuff, and get out?"

"Pretty much, yeah," Pierce replies.

"Do you honestly think it will be that simple?" Brian asks.

"Fuck no."

"Didn't think so."

"You two just be ready when I come out."

"Nothing to worry about," Brian says, looking at the rocket launcher laying next to him. "Trust me."

"This is going to be fun," Bruce says as Brian puts his phone away.

"Yep," Brian replies, looking at him. "Nothing like shooting rockets at cars from above."

"Well, I'm ready for it," Bruce says, placing his rocket launcher onto his lap. "What about you?"

"I'm always ready," Brian replies, looking out the side of the helicopter.

* * *

"Alright, I'm coming out now," Pierce says as he pulls out of the parking lot. "Keep my ass covered 'till I can find somewhere to hide."

"We're on it," Brian says as he scoots himself to the side of the helicopter, raising the rocket launcher up to his shoulder as Bruce does the same. "Got what you went in there for?"

"Hell yeah," Pierce says as a Morningstar car rounds a corner, driving straight at Pierce. Brian aims the rocket launcher, firing directly in front of the car. The rocket flys down towards the ground as the car drives forward, into the intended line of fire from the rocket. It collides with the hood of the car, exploding and destroying the car, instantly killing the Morningstar members inside.

Brian loads another rocket into the launcher as Pierce continues ahead. "This guy's a better pilot than you are!" Bruce yells as two more cars come racing down the road.

"Are you seriously pulling this up right now?!" Brian yells back as they both fire a rocket at the two cars, destroying them.

"You're damn right I am!" Bruce replies as they both load another rocket into their launchers.

"You guys droppin' them or what?" Pierce asks as he notices a car speeding towards him from under the train tracks.

"Normally, I would laugh about shit like this," Brian says as Bruce fires a rocket at the car. "But that fucking hurt, so shut up about it!"

"That's two things you fucking crashed into!" Bruce says as he reloads.

"I'm going to fucking beat your ass!" Brian yells louder as he looks at Bruce.

"Shoot them already!" Pierce yells over the phone, causing both Brian and Bruce to fire rockets at the cars ahead of him.

"I could probably fly better than you!" Bruce yells at Brian as they reload.

"It's harder than it looks, asshole!" Brian yells back as he fires another rocket at a Morningstar car, destroying it instantly.

"You two gonna hit these assholes or are you two going to keep on bitchin' at each other?!" Pierce complains, grabbing both of their attentions as they fire more rockets at oncoming cars. As Pierce continues to drive down the road, he notices more Morningstar cars driving out of alleyways. "Damn, these guys don't give up!" Pierce yells.

"They're a bit too cliche as well!" Brian yells as he and Bruce quickly reload their launchers, firing more rockets at the cars and destroying them.

"It's just as bad as your flying skills!" Bruce yells back as they reload.

"Don't let these assholes get too close!" Pierce yells over the phone.

"Working on it, Pierce!" Brian yells as he fires another rocket at a Morningstar car. Pierce turns right, onto another road as he notices two Morningstar APCs up the road, along with several armed Morningstar members.

"They're blocking the road up here," he says. "Help me out."

"On it," Brian says, firing a rocket directly at the left APC. As it collides, it destroys the APC, throwing the members into the air as the other APC catches fire and explodes. Some members get up, only to be hit by a rocket Bruce launches.

"God, you're bad at this!" Bruce yells as they reload, looking at Brian.

"Shut the fuck up, Bruce!" Brian yells back, staring at him.

"Another roadblock," Pierce says, driving past the first destroyed roadblock. Brian and Bruce don't listen. They both continue to stare at each other, Brian staring angrily and Bruce staring back with an evil grin. "Guys, roadblock!" Pierce yells.

Without breaking eye contact, the two fire a rocket at the roadblock. Both rockets fly directly into both APCs, destroying them instantly as the members are thrown into the air by the force of the explosion. The members hit the ground hard like a ragdoll. None of them get up from this.

"The building is just over the bridge," Pierce says as he speeds off.

Brian drops his rocket launcher as he watches Pierce drive off. "Alright, we'll find a place to set up," he says, grabbing a sniper rifle as the helicopter flys up onto a building. He hops out of the helicopter with Bruce, who is also equipped with a sniper. Bruce runs in front of Brian, stopping him as he grins.

"Don't suck at sniping, too," Bruce says, causing Brian to stare at him. Pissed off, Brian kicks Bruce off the side of the building, then runs and jumps off the side as well, rope swinging them both onto the wall. Brian lands on his feet as Bruce hits the building hard with his shoulder. Grunting, he presses his feet against the wall, positioning himself as he and Brian unsling their snipers. As they aim down, they notice Pierce stop the car, getting out and running down the road. Brian aims his rifle up the road, noticing two cars speeding down to meet Pierce.

"Bruce, we got two cars incoming," Brian says, keeping his rifle trained on the cars.

"I see them," Bruce replies, aiming his rifle at the cars. The cars stop a few meters away from Pierce's car as four members disembark from the cars. Brian aims the sights onto a male member's head, pulling the trigger. The man's head recoils back as blood spurts out of it, falling onto the ground limp as a ragdoll.

Bruce fires a shot at a female member, piercing her chest. The round flies through her, hitting another Morningstar member in the shin as the female member's body recoils backwards, falling on top of the other member. He fires another round as the member pushes the body off of him, hitting him directly in his head. His head recoils back onto the ground, not moving once again. He fixes his sights onto the final member as Brian fires, watching as the man falls backwards onto the ground like a ragdoll.

Brian shifts his attention back up the road, noticing another car speeding down. He fires a random round at the windshield, thinking he wouldn't hit something. Fortunately, the round pierces the driver's chest, killing him almost instantly as the car turns sharply to the right. It crashes directly into a building, out of Brian's line of sight. Brian lowers his rifle slightly, chuckling to himself over the fact that he made the shot. He reaims his rifle over at the building, watching for any survivors to run around the corner of it. He shifts his attention elsewhere after a few moments, assuming that everyone in the car died in the crash.

He shifts the scope over to Pierce as he runs into an alleyway, over to where the safehouse should be. As Pierce goes out of sight, he shifts his attention to the remaining Morningstar members, Bruce fires as Brian notices two Morningstar members recoil to their right, both falling to the ground as limp as a ragdoll. Brian aims at the final member, firing his rifle. The round hits the man's shoulder, separating his arm from the rest of his body as the man recoils to his right, hitting the ground hard.

"Eugh," Brian says in disgust as he lowers his rifle, looking at Bruce. "Well, job well done?"

"Yeah, I guess," Bruce says, lowering his rifle and looking at Brian. "More than I can say about your flying skills, at least."

"Yep," Brian says, slinging his sniper rifle and unholstering his Shepard. "I'm out." He aims the Shepard at the rope, jumping as he pulls the trigger. The rope is severed, sending Brian falling. As he falls, he lowers his head over the rest of his body as if he was diving. He lands in the water, diving a few feet down as he hits the water. He swims up, then looks over to the building to notice the helicopter flying away. Turning around, he swims to the ledge, grabbing onto it and pulling himself up, out of the water. He pulls out his phone as he walks up the stairs, pressing on Shaundi's contact as he walks into the street. He raises his phone up to his ear as the phone starts ringing.

"Hey Brian," Shaundi says as the ringing stops. "Wasn't really expecting you to get up this morning."

"Yeah, I need to work on my piloting skills in helicopters," Brian replies. "Anyways, you doing anything right now?"

"No," Shaundi says, "Why?"

"I need a ride to the penthouse. I just jumped off the side of a building."

"You can't be serious right now, Brian..."

"You're right. I'm not serious," Brian says sarcastically. "That's why I'm calling you for a ride right now."

Shaundi sighs over the phone, "Alright," she says, "I'm coming. Where are you?"

"One of the bridges to the south, I think on the east side?"

"Alright, I'm on my way." Shaundi says, hanging up.

* * *

A few minutes pass as Brian slowly paces back and forth when a purple car pulls up to him. He walks over, noticing Shaundi in the drivers seat. He opens up the door, getting into the car as Shaundi stares at him. "You need to stop doing random stupid shit," she says.

"Well hello to you too, Shaundi," Brian replies as he closes the door.

"Seriously, jumping off a fucking building?" She asks, still staring at him.

"Bruce pissed me off."

"How did Bruce piss you off?"

"Because I crashed the fucking helicopter on the pad. Lets just get to the penthouse right now."

Shaundi sighs, looking forward as she drives off. "Just stop doing stupid shit, Brian."

* * *

Shaundi turns left, driving into the garage as Brian looks up. She parks in the nearest parking space, killing the engine as he opens the door. She glances at him, opening her door and stepping out. Brian punches the elevator button, watching as the doors open to the elevator. He steps in, clicking the penthouse level as Shaundi walks in. Stepping back, Brian crosses his arms, lowering his head as he leans on the wall. As the elevator doors close, Shaundi looks over to Brian, slightly tilting her head to the right in confusion. "You look like you're about to kill someone," she says.

"Maybe," Brian replies.

"What the fuck are you planning..." She asks, facing him.

"Oh, nothing..." He says, "...Just going to beat someone into submission."

"Bruce pissed you off to the point where you literally jumped off a building, and now you want to beat the shit out of him?"

"Yep," Brian says, looking at her.

"Jesus Christ, Brian..." Shaundi says as the elevator doors open.

"Eh," Brian lets out, walking out of the elevator. As he walks to the main room, he notices Bruce standing next to the couches, looking out the window. Bruce turns, grinning as he sees Brian walking up to him.

"How was the swim?" Bruce asks rhetorically. "I bet it wa-"

Brian grabs both of his shoulders, striking him in the gut with his knees. Bruce grunts as he is hit, then quickly jumps back a bit, dodging the next knee Brian tries to strike him with. As Brian attempts to recover, Bruce head-butts him, causing them both to stumble back, clutching their heads. They both lower their hands a the exact same time, staring at each other.

After a few moments, Brian lets out a battle cry, sprinting towards Bruce. Bruce starts sprinting as well, pulling his right arm back and clenching his hand into a fist. As they get within three feet of each other, Bruce swings a hard right hook at Brian, aiming for the head. Brian sees this, jumping to his right to dodge, onto the couch as Bruce's arm swings forward. Brian jump, raising his right arm over Bruce and swinging it down on his head. Bruce falls to the ground, grunting as Brian pins him onto the floor, swinging a hard left hook into his face. Grunting again, he pushes Brian off of him, reversing the pin and throwing a hard right hook into Brian's head.

"Get off me!" Brian grunts, raising his left leg and kicking Bruce over him. Bruce tucks and rolls forward as he is kicked forward, quickly shooting back up onto his feet. As Brian stumbles up, Bruce quickly turns, grabbing Brian's shirt collar and pushing him down, smashing his head into the glass coffee table and shattering it. Grunting, Brian quickly kicks Bruce in the gut, causing him to stumble backwards. As Brian gets up, he rubs his face quickly, glancing at his hand and noticing blood. He then looks back at Bruce, sprinting at him and tackling him through the glass window.

"WOAH!" A saint yells, jumping backwards as she hears the glass shatter. As Bruce hits the ground, he kicks Brian over him. Brian hits the ground hard, groaning as he slowly gets up. Bruce gets up a bit faster than Brian, turning around as Brian rubs the back of his head. He jumps, shooting his legs up and kicking Brian directly into the pool as he falls and hits the floor with a grunt. Soon after, he gets up, jumping into the pool after Brian.

Shaundi runs up to the shattered glass window, watching the entire fight unfold with widen angry eyes and a dropped jaw. "What the fuck, guys!" She yells.

"Hey, Shaundi," a saints says, walking up to her with cash. "I got a thousand on the boss kicking the other guy's ass."

"Are you seriously trying to make a bet with me over who will win this brawl?" Shaundi asks, glancing at the saint.

"Well, yeah," he replies. "I'm not the only one doing it right now."

"What." She says, turning around and noticing the saints exchanging money and making bets with each other.

"I got twenty on the boss!" One saints says.

"No, I got thirty on the other guy!" Another one yells out.

"You gotta be kidding me..." She says, turning and noticing the two swimming away from each other. They both stumble up the steps, both obviously weak and tired now of fighting. Bruce grins, standing at a stance to sprint at Brian.

"Come on, Brian..." He says, squinting his eyes at him. "You gotta step your weak ass up and stop hitting me like a little girl." This grabs Brian's attention, causing him to stand in the same stance as Bruce.

"Oh you're going to fucking die now!" Brian yells. "COME AT ME, BRO!"

With this, they both shout out a battle cry, sprinting and pulling their right arms back at the same exact time. When they got close enough, they both swing a hard right hook. Brian feels his fist collide with Bruce's the exact same time as his collides with Brian's cheek. He recoils back, smashing his head against the steps as he barley notices Bruce recoil back and smash his head against the red edge of the pool. Blackness soon follows for him.

* * *

Everyone suddenly goes silent as they all stare at the two. A small blood puddle begins forming at each of their heads. Shaundi's jaw lowers even more now from what she just witnessed.

"Shit man," one saint says. "Did those two knock each other out?"

"Holy shit, they did!" Another saint replies. "Wait... What does that mean about the money?"

"I am seriously fucking confused right now."

"What happens in a bet when there's a draw?"

"God damnit..." Shaundi mutters under her breath.

**God damn, that took a little while longer than expected. Anyways, here's the fifth chapter. Kinda got stuck on what I should do with this chapter since I'm going to have to put some small fillers into these next few chapters. The activities are too small for me to write a whole chapter on. Oh well. Hope you enjoyed this chapter.**


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